Thank you for not being another number.

115 Replies

I don’t want to fill your lives up with words addressed to people you’ve never met in places you’ve never been to, but sometimes life leads you down one road and you have to nod your head and say Thank You.

Wednesday is my mom’s birthday, so it would be wrong of me not to post this for her. She deserves it.

Day three of the letter challenge – your parents

Dear Mom and Dad,

Thank you for so many wonderful little life lessons that I cannot even begin to list. That said, it doesn’t mean I won’t try.

Thank you for reminding me on a (sometimes) daily basis how much money I really have in my bank account, and that I’m not broke. Thank you for reminding me that money doesn’t matter so much. Thank you for reading all the stories and novel manuscripts and flash fiction ideas and Christmas lists with excessive detail that I send you. Thank you for being more than a devoted fan, and more like constructive critics.

For calling to rehash episodes of The Office in a way that makes me feel like I watched it, too. For believing in the power of a liberal arts education but not forcing me to do something ultra-conventional with my life. For deciding that I should be in New York—not Philadelphia. And not just because you love the Giants and hate the Eagles, but because that’s where it’s all happening.

Thank you for not laughing at me when I do something stupid. For having impeccable judgment when it comes to the people in my life, but letting me ultimately make my own decisions. Thank you for cooking all my favorite foods while I’m home and insisting on sending me back with stuff.

Thank you for paying the tuition and rent each month, trusting that it’s not money down the drain. Thank you for teaching me about love and compromise and finding someone who is just as crazy about me as you are about each other. For not settling for second best.

Thank you for the hundreds of sacrifices, big and small, you’ve made in the last thirty years. For sticking it out through the end of high school, college, and the years that followed so that I could be here today. For always working hard and instilling that same belief in me. Sometimes I wonder how people can do anything less.

And of course, thank you for always being the ray of sunlight that breaks through the clouds surrounding the world. For being two seventeen-year-olds who fell in love and never looked back. For giving me the hope that divorce is not inevitable, that some things do last, that some stories do have happy endings. Thank you for not being another number.

Love,
K

By the way, every month I send out a short + sweet newsletter brimming with cool finds related to the monthly theme. It'd be stellar if you subscribed. If it's not worthy, it doesn't go in the newsletter. That. Simple.

115 thoughts on “Thank you for not being another number.”

  7. Ginny

    For once, the wordsmith is without words. Well, almost. I love that you can so beautifully articulate what many of us think, but never share. I love that you value people and relationships…so deeply that it hurts, but knowing that if you don’t hurt, then you’re not really living. I love that you look at daily life and see not the mundane, but the bigger picture. Mostly, I love you, who you are and what you stand for. And I’m proud to be your biggest fan. Keep sharing your gift.

  9. Ava Aston's Muckery

    Wow that was really beautiful. I feel so guilty because I know I need to write a letter just like that to my parents and I have never done that.

    Thanks for inspiring me today.

    Blessings,

    Ava
    xox

  10. The Gates of Lodore

    It’s amazing that we all go through a phase where we want to be nothing like our parents, only to later discover that we are all more like them than we care to admit. Your post illustrates that beautifully. But throwing that Eagles/Giants stuff in there – that is especially telling :)

  12. archiegrrl

    I just got married this summer on my parents’ 40th wedding anniversary. And part of the reason I waited until I was 35 to get married was because I had a model of a really good relationship, and I knew I needed to wait until I found the right guy. And I finally did!

    Congrats on being Fresh Pressed — even though I’ve never met you or your folks, I’m grateful to have stumbled across your post as a reminder of all the thanks I should give my parents. *smile*

  13. rtcrita

    This was so beautiful in ways that only a parent can understand. You brought a tear to my eye because I have a daughter in college and a son who will be on his way there next fall and I can only hope, as a parent, that they have learned the life lessons that I have tried to teach them over the years and will appreciate them in the long run as much as you appreciate the ones your parents have taught you. What a wise young woman you are for see these things! I have no doubt your parents are extremely proud of you.

  15. Evie Garone

    Aaaaawwwwwwwww, I hope my two boys feel like this about me & Dad! How sweet! I’m so sure your parents are proud of you! You GO GIRL!

    Congrats to you being on the Front Page!

    evelyngarone.com

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  21. mmgoodsongs

    That is a lovely post! I think we all need to be reminded to count our blessings. I had two wonderful parents and I hope and pray every day that I can do the same for my kids. It’s nice that you acknowledge their marriage. I think that a good marriage is one of the greatest gifts you can give to your children. I got really lucky in that department too. Your parents sound amazing.

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  24. Kellie Elmore

    what amazing parents you have. i hope i can be as good a mom to my son as they have you. must have been hard to let you fly, but they know your wings will lead you back home one day. a blossoming young talent you are! best wishes in all you do!

  25. leeceebee

    Such a nice letter to your mom…I could send this to my mom–almost verbatim in terms of what she’s done for me and how much I appreciate her help and advice over the years.

  27. whenquiet

    My dear young lady, Bless you! I literally teared up at the end of your article. Our daughter moved out three months ago and is on her own. I pray that she shares just a portion of the sentiment that you so warmly express….100% Gratitude! Marvelousy touching!

  30. Abigail

    You have no clue how privileged you are to have parents who will critique your own work. The way I see it at the moment, I’ll be lucky if my mom ever reads one of my books. It’s not that she thinks writing is stupid or a waste of time or anything negative like that. It’s just that she has such a slow reading speed that it takes her almost three months to read one novel. So I’m not even about to ask her for critiques when she really doesn’t have the time which meant that for almost six years of my writing career, I had no one to edit them except myself. So always appreciate them for that.

    You are also so privileged to have parents who can pay for your college. Mine can’t. I never expected them to. So always thank them for that, because it’s not just non-trads that can’t pay for school.

    And that part about divorce–so true. It’s even truer because my parents almost did and that hurt me at 18 more than I ever thought it might.

  34. edebock

    As the mom of three grown kids just a little older than you are, I was touched! Thanks for sharing & congrats on being Freshly Pressed!

  35. Locksley McPherson Jnr

    Very nicely worded post :) I wish sometimes I could feel the same and write a thank you letter to my parents.. It’s so hard sometimes though, because they can really drive me crazy!! One day, I guess, I’ll feel differently and put into words how I feel..

  36. gmomj

    Wow!
    Your parents must be very proud of you.
    It’s really great when one of the children shows some recognition and appreciation.
    As a parent we just want our kids to be happy.
    After all the years raising you younguns pats on the back are just that.
    We want you to be happy and law abiding would be swell too.
    Kudos on getting fresh!

  38. danclair

    thanks for reminding us that marriage relationships can happen that way. my parents divorced when i was 12, and although i don’t have a negative view of marriage, it’s still great to hear from someone who’s proud of her parents for sticking to their vows.

  40. emjayandthem

    What a wonderful tribute to two important people by someone smart enough to have figured out to say it .. now. Kudos! And congrats on being fresh pressed; well deserved :)

  41. mairzeebp

    I love your post. Sometimes people underestimate how powerful it is to wake up every day knowing that you have someone in your corner no matter what the circumstance. I have been lucky enough to have parents like that and I love them in a way that sometimes I struggle to find words for. They are the lights of my life. Thanks for sharing something warm and wonderful. I LOVE the picture at the end. Love it.

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  44. Aunt Carolyn

    She means the divorce stats. Despite the fact that marriage is hard work and her parents had their share of trials, they didn’t allow their marriage to become one of the two that end in divorce. They didn’t become another number.

  46. sheryll

    What a wonderful letter! We moms and dads when we say We are doing our best when it comes to our children, we really mean it.
    You have terrific parents!

  53. Jose Miguel Vasquez

    Beautifully written post. This is the kind of spirit I am trying to capture with my blogs. I’ve been out of it for a few months now but reading your post reminds me why doing this is so vital to as you say “rewriting life”.

    I hope that I can inspire my kids to write like this someday just by giving it my all in this crazy game we call life….

    I look forward to keeping up with your posts! Thank you for sharing.

  54. busyman1918

    Congratulations for being freshly pressed. Reading your post has made me thought about my parents and how lucky I am to have them! Now I will go and give them a call lol

    The Best Spinner

  56. Matty

    Your words have brought tears to my eyes. Those were some of the most well put-together words I’ve seen in a very long time. Well said :)

    Keep up your outstanding work and never look back.

  62. ldsrr91

    Every parent dreams about a child such as you, seldom do we see it. You have a great attitude and I predict you will go far.

    Nice post.

    DS

  64. alecgaun

    You are such a sweet daughter. You’re parents are very lucky to have you. And you’re too lucky to have your parents with you. Check out my new blog. It’s about my mom and how I miss her so much. :( Wish she was here with me.

  65. Lisa Smith Molinari

    Congrats on being Freshly Pressed! Great post — loved the mix of funny, heartwarming and serious thoughts. Gave me a lump in my throat because my parents were young and in love, and raised my brother and I well, and had a good relationship. I would have said all the things you said, but a little thing called a “Mid-Life Crisis” afflicted my father after 35 years, and he ran off with a much younger woman! It is wonderful that you do not take your parents’ accomplishment for granted. Congrats to them for succeeding where so many others have failed.

  67. lowsaltfoods

    I thought I took a wrong turning but, after reading that, I realise that I am on right on track. :)

  69. Nandini

    Very nicely written and expressed. I feel the same gratitude towards my parents, but could not have expressed in such a beautiful way. Well, you really helped me with your post. :)

    God Bless You. :D

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  74. psychodoodle

    “For being two seventeen-year-olds who fell in love and never looked back. For giving me the hope that divorce is not inevitable, that some things do last, that some stories do have happy endings. ”

    Nice… Not everyone is blessed enough to believe that. Really good to know that there are still people like that….

  77. eisee

    saw a beautiful rainbow early today… i was reminded of my great buddy – my father! then i read your post, its awesome to feel the feeling i have right now :-)

  79. auntbethany

    Wow, what a great post. I actually am partaking in a similar challenge of my own, and happened to write my Mom a thank you letter in the process. I’m trying to do one random act of kindness (or, one random act of “Christmas,” as I like to call it) per day throughout the holiday season. This post gives me another idea for my blog. Thanks, and congrats on being FP!

  80. saintjaix

    The warmth and happiness of the relationship tugs at the heart. A reflection of a universal dream that for some perverse human reason is such a rare commodity and rare scene. Give me more pain- I love to cry midst my solitudes.

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  86. kaleighsomers Post author

    Don’t let your fears hold you back from saying what you feel. I always find it easier to write about emotions. If you care about someone, it’s sometimes hard to stop yourself from rambling on and on. That’s my problem. I hope you share gratitude with them. I can tell you my parents appreciated it.

  90. kaleighsomers Post author

    Thanks. I love when that happens and you find something at the right time. Greatest feeling ever. I know too many people who are settling lately and it’s breaking my heart.

  91. kaleighsomers Post author

    Wow, thank you. I’m only now starting to realize the power those words had on so many hundreds of people who read them. Thank you so much for sharing your encouragement.

  92. kaleighsomers Post author

    I’m still trying to figure out what it means to rewrite life, but I think you’re getting the sentiment of it better than even I am. I hope you keep coming back and keep enjoying what I have to say, and that your kids find it in their heart to share similar words with you.

  96. kaleighsomers Post author

    Aw, thank you. I had trouble picking a photo but then I saw this one and I knew, even after being married for 25+ years, that this most recent one spoken thousands of words. Love lasts. It really does.

  99. kaleighsomers Post author

    I’m thinking we’re never happy with what we have. They drive me crazy, especially my mom who has her own PR firm. She’s always got changes and suggestions and critiques, but it makes my work better in the end. You should try sending to friends. Mine have been some of the most loyal fans in the world. Strangers are good, too. They’re critical and constructive. I’m glad yours stuck it out. Keep faith!

  100. kaleighsomers Post author

    I’m sure she appreciates you, even if she doesn’t say it outright. And it’s easier when we grow up and we’re on our own to stop feeling like we can’t appreciate our parents.

  102. kaleighsomers Post author

    So you’re right around the same stage of the parenting process as my parents. Thank you for all your encouragement and belief in me, having never even met me. I’m sure your children appreciate you, but I was a teen not long ago and know that it’s not something we like admitting outright.

  104. kaleighsomers Post author

    Oh, wow, thank you. I hope your parents both end up happy, even if not right now. Divorce is really hard and it’s easy to give up hope. Please try not to!

  110. Aunt Carolyn

    My mother would be beaming over the kind words of her first granddaughter – one she would have so enjoyed seeing grow and mature – spoken about her own daughter. Our parents were models of faith, loyalty and friendship. They lived those ideals, and I think my sister would agree, that’s where we first learned them. To see family values span the generations is gratifying.

    And to those of us who find we have become yet another number – and to our children – all hope is not lost. Our children learn what we live, and we make a choice each day about how we handle our responsibilities as parents. My mother taught us that we are strong, and although life isn’t fair, it is good.

    Happy birthday, Ginny. Enjoy your gifts!

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  112. Corrine Datz

    This post appears to recieve a large ammount of visitors. How do you advertise it? It offers a nice unique spin on things. I guess having something real or substantial to talk about is the most important thing.

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